Actor Pankaj Tripathi has performed wonderfully in many Bollywood films, but a more inspiring story comes to the forefront in the form of love, perseverance, and transcending societal barriers through his marriage to Mridula.
Pankaj Tripathi and Wife’s Love Story
The relationship, spanning decades, was no ordinary tale of love, but of challenges riddled with all possible faces of tension-from antimarriage at the behest of cultural traditions to familial opposition deep-rooted in social hierarchies.
Mridula Tripathi recalled their incredible journey in an open interview with the YouTube channel Conversations with Atul. They talked of how their love blossoming in the most unexpected circumstances was pretty much hushed up from their families as there was a strict setting to their social community.
Early Days of Their Relationship
It was at a pre-wedding ceremony for their siblings that Mridula first saw Pankaj. Pankaj Tripathi was in the 11th standard, while Mridula was in the 9th standard. They were immediately attracted to one another, and what would start as innocent admiration developed soon into a relationship.
In the conservative environment of their hometown, however, it was highly unusual-and scandalous-for a boy and girl to talk to each other, let alone feel romantically inclined towards one another.
“It was not allowed that boys and girls should talk or even gaze at each other,” Mridula recalled. The societal conditions were so tight that the couple had to steal time with each other, always fearing they might get caught by their families. Their love relationship had to remain hidden because that was not the general trend in their area-they were mostly arranged marriages.
Another challenge to their relationship was that Pankaj’s sister had earlier married into the brother of Mridula. The culture then made it unacceptable for a woman to marry into a family as the previous marriage brought a mixture with customs from another family.
For a woman from a higher-class family or, as they say, from a family of ‘kul’, it was thought to be wrong to marry into a family of lesser stature, be it for the reason that another woman from the same family had already become one with a better stature family.
This social hierarchy played a very strong role in causing tension in both families, more predominantly within Mridula’s family.
Her mother, who was in the know about everything, did try to dissuade the romance by asking her daughter to call Pankaj bhaiya–a word used to dispel any kind of romantic sentiment. But Mridula found it totally unbelievable for her to call him bhaiya. “I couldn’t call him that, so I began calling him ‘Pankaj ji’. Even that didn’t feel right so I just settled on ‘ji’,” she recalled with humour.
Even this informal compromise aside, the societal expectations loomed large and complicated matters even further with the passage of time .
The Bare-Faced Confession
Perhaps the most critical point in their love is when Mridula gets up to speak to her father about her decision, which is going to marry Pankaj. After all, this will be a huge decision taken after years of bracing through the social demand that had been bestowed upon her as well as the threat of being married to some other guy.
“I was afraid of telling my father,” Mridula confessed, going on to say that her mother and sister-in-law would be even worse. But her father’s reaction wasn’t what Mridula had expected at all. “Why didn’t you tell me sooner? I wouldn’t have wasted time looking for boys,” he told her, giving her the relief and support she had longed for.
While Mridula’s father was ready to accept her relation with Pankaj, he advised her to keep this news between them for some time. He subsequently asked Pankaj to request her hand in marriage formally and then the family informed Mridula’s mother about the news of their marriage. But again, this news did not find acceptance on the face.
Family Opposition and Emotional Struggles
The opposition from Mridula’s mother and sister-in-law was prompt and strong. “There was a tehelka, a bawaal,” said Mridula, referring to the commotion that ensued. Her mother was particularly worried that Pankaj wouldn’t feed her daughter. At that time, Pankaj Tripathi was an aspiring actor far from where he is today, and his uncertain career path gave no one in Mridula’s family any reason to have confidence in him.
Similarly, her sister-in-law was not any better off. She, too, had crossed her caste wall by marrying into Mridula’s family, as she was an upper-caste bride marrying below her status. Traditionally, their caste-based social system regarded marriages between the two families as overstepping social walls, thus not easily digested by the older generations.
Mridula said that though she faced initial rejections, her family still went to the wedding and gave their nod of approval for the marriage. However, the ill will by Pankaj’s mother against Mridula still lingers on. “My mother-in-law hasn’t accepted me up to this day. She’s still upset about the intermingling of families,” Mridula confessed, realizing how those social constructs still linger in their relationship.
Overcoming Challenges and Moving Forward
Yet, despite all these challenges the couple has continued to move forward, and their love has stood the test of time. Finally, Pankaj Tripathi had success in his career; today, he has emerged as one among the most respected actors in the Indian film industry. Success also dispelled some of the doubts surrounding their relationship in their early days.
However, Mridula’s story is a stark reminder of the societal challenges that many couples across parts of India face because of the cultural and caste-based norms that hold considerable power over personal relationships. Though love marriages may be better accepted today, they are still rejected in many places, especially in some regions where traditional values seem to rule.
Mridula and Pankaj’s love story reflects so many who had to challenge norms for it to thrive. Their stories are an inspiring tale of fighting on every conceivable level in which love, despite tests posed to it by the establishments which brought up deep-rooted cultural barriers, found a way to conquer.
The love saga of Pankaj Tripathi and Mridula was not a love story of two people trying to overcome their individual disasters, but a reflection of the many societal pressures couples in India still have to undergo.
This is a lesson for the fact that changing societal attitudes about relationships and even marriage would make one leave behind caste-based, social status-oriented, and culturally constrained barriers.
For Mridula and Pankaj, love could conquer all. And yet, their story also speaks of that cultural construction as well, since Mridula’s mother-in-law’s continued displeasure reminds that some fights against society take time to win, but it won’t bring down the conquest of love. Yet, their journey together would remain one of the proofs of the strength of love.
